Soooo, I’m using the next best thing. First Friday of every month (and perhaps every Friday), I’m picking out some interesting searches recorded to this site by Google Analytics from the previous month (or week) and I’m going to provide an answer to that curious searcher’s quest. As I’m sure you’re aware, this will be a very serious feature.

Admittedly, this week is a little Washington heavy, but I’m just in a Husky bashing mood.

• “is mike bellotti married to a mormon” (Google Search in Provo, UT)

It’s not clear to this blog if Bellotti has remarried his ex-wife. The last public report I found from 2009 says they were engaged so it’s possible. However, I’m going out on a limb here and saying no, she’s not Mormon.

• “washington huskies vs oregon ducks record” (Google Search in Salem, OR)

I’m sorry, that search wasn’t very clear. Did you mean since 2004? I assume that’s what you meant. The record is 6 wins for Oregon and no wins for Washington.

• “kirk herbstreit jeans” (Google Search in St. Cloud, MN) &  “kirk herbstreit orange tan” (Google Search in Wynnewood, PA)

I’ve long been a proponent of Herbie’s nice, orange tan. But seeing the man in jeans? I cannot support that (mostly because I can’t find that). But here’s an image I took of my TV with my iPhone last season. Orange enough?

Hollywood Tan's number one customer in Ohio.

• “is ochocinco a duck” (Google Search in Seattle, WA)

Are you kidding? He’s hardly even a Beaver. He even admitted he only went to class the first week at Oregon State. That was a Dennis Erickson rent-a-player special.

• “photo billy joe hobert” (Google Search in Seattle, WA)

You’re right. This site needs a photo of Billy Joe Hobert so here you go. It seems odd that he’s holding a wad of cash while playing.

Toward the end, Billy Joe just started taking his wads of cash everywhere.

• “prediction for washington state and montana state” (Google Search in Kalispell, MT)

The guess here is this was a high volume search. Ah, nope, just one lonely, misled searcher. I predict 2-10 for the Cougars. The Montana State Bobcats will go 7-5. You can take that to the bank. I researched it for like 21 seconds.

• “is matt barkley going to have a better season” (Google Search in Dallas, TX)

Wow, this is like a real question. I’ll give it a real answer. I’d have to say yes. His TD/INT ratio was 15/14 last year and he completed just shy of 60% of his passes. Not great, but he was a true freshman and it’s hard to believe there won’t be improvement. Then again, perhaps Autzen Stadium shook him of every ounce of confidence (he had a lot) and he will simply melt away for the rest of his career. With Lane Kiffin, it’s possible.

• “jake locker uw gpa” (Google Search in Spokane, WA)

I’m just guessing here, but I believe it’s 0.0. I don’t know how he’s staying eligible. I suppose they’re cheating.

• “duck vs husky football jokes” (Google Search in Seattle, WA)

Tell me if you’ve heard this one.

Jake Locker is 9-20 as a starting quarterback, has a career completion percentage of 53.3% and is projected by many as a Heisman candidate and top NFL draft pick.

Actually, that’s not even a joke. It’s just a fact.

FOTB Prediction: Black helmet, white jersey, black pants, black shoes. You can simulate this combination here. And it should be noted, Miss FOTB nailed it without  knowing the combo had already been reported.

The game without a name is back. Don’t believe me?

You must not have have heard, Washington is 3-4.

It’s time to rally the heroes of yesteryear. Someone call Steve Emtman. Send Don James a text. Twitter Napoleon Kaufman and Facebook Billy Joe Hobert. The legends of Montlake must know…the Huskies are back!

Scoff at 3-4 all you want, this is the new era of purple reign where moral victories get equal billing to bowl game triumphs. They almost beat LSU!

Epic home wins make a season. They beat USC!

Three wins indicates a resurgence. They can beat Oregon!

There’s only one problem with this comeback tour. On Saturday, one team is significantly better than the other and it ain’t the ones wearing the emasculating color.

We’re being told it’s a rivalry game in which anything can happen and that’s true. It’s been said that Washington is a much different team at home. Also factual. Some have noted this version of Husky football plays hard and always has a chance to win. It’s no lie.

FOTB's on fire. Two in a row.

The only problem I’m ultimately having with embracing this inevitable upset is the simple, tiny, irrelevant fact that Oregon’s football team is a lot better than Washington’s.

Watch the first half of the season and call me a liar. The Huskies are at the bottom of the conference in most offensive and defensive categories. They don’t defend the run well and Oregon just so happens to be really good at that. There’s no better crowd killer than a dominant running game.

The Huskies are fairly one dimensional on offense and against a good defense like Oregon’s, that’s not going to get it done. The Ducks have made a killing in games where they shut down the opposing running game and teed off on the quarterback.

Don’t get me wrong, here. This is going to be a close game. If LSU, USC and Arizona struggled at Husky Stadium, there’s no reason to suspect the Ducks will have it easy. Jake Locker has become a legitimate threat and if there’s a quarterback that can survive an anemic running game, he’s it. You also can’t discredit the desire the Huskies play with. Any team that competes as hard as they do is going to have a chance to win.

But none of it’s enough, not when the Ducks are this much better. On Saturday, a rivalry will be reborn, but Oregon’s dominance will continue.