Almost forgot this week’s picks amidst a sickness that has taken hold and forced me into a semi-comatose state of  being where all I can do is lay still and watch football. Well, that, and the only game left that matters is on Thursday, so what’s the point?

And no mom, it’s not H1N1, so settle down. But, Chip, don’t think I’m not still winning the day.

Last Week: 3-1
Season: 49-19

Arizona @ Arizona State
I’m not sure what these two teams traditionally call their rivalry game but this year, let’s just go with the “Downer Derby.” ASU lost any hope of avoiding a losing season and still having bowl eligibility a week ago. Arizona rushed the field to celebrate their run for the roses,  but forgot all NCAA sanctioned games last 60 minutes before ending. Now, they trudge their depressed football corpses onto the field to salvage the next best thing – whatever that may be.

The Pick…Arizona

Washington State @ Washington
While it would be hilarious to watch the Cougars win the Crapple Cup again, I can’t see how this could happen. Even Washington should beat these guys by 20. And they probably will.

The Pick…Washington

UCLA @ USC
Ooh, the intrigue. Could the dynasty in L.A. officially be over as procalimed by the UCLA marketing department at the start of Rick Neuheisel’s tenure? I doubt it. In fact, I think people are making too much of the end of this dynasty. It’s still the same coach with the same caliber of players. Perhaps the Pac-10 has caught up, but that doesn’t mean USC won’t be right there again in 2010. As for the present day, I think it’ll be close, but the home field edge gives the game to the Trojans.

The Pick…USC

Notre Dame  @ Stanford
Call me a Pac-10 homer, but after seeing mark Ingram against Auburn, the nation’s best running back will be on display tonight against Notre Dame. Jim Harbaugh’s the kind of coach who will try and pad his guy’s numbers and I’ll bet we see Toby Gerhart surge to the front of the Heisman pack against the Irish’s porous defense.

The Pick…Stanford

This week’s prediction post takes on a different approach after having read Jon Wilner of the San Jose Mercury News make his case for Stanford. While applauding his gumption for sticking his neck out in defense of the home town team, I found myself agreeing with, well, none of it.

As such, I have to offer my counter. Wilner’s 10 reasons the Cardinal will win are summarized to keep this thing from turning into a novella.

10. Wilner says: Stanford plays disciplined defense which will make up for a disadvantage in speed.
OTP says: The Cardinal are 7th against the run in the Pac-10. Before last Saturday, USC was giving up roughly 80 yards a game on the ground. Oregon totaled 392. Discipline or not, the Cardinal aren’t good enough on defense to stop Oregon.

9. Wilner says: Chris Owusu, who has taken three kicks back for touchdowns, is due to break a big return beacause he hasn’t in awhile.
OTP says: Stanford and Oregon are the top two teams in covering kickoffs. I doubt either will break down this week even against stellar returners. And as we’ll see later, Wilner has a penchant for figuring something will happen on the sole basis that it’s due. In that case, I’d like to bet everything I have on black.

8. Wilner says: Stanford ruined Oregon’s big season in 2001.
OTP says: Cute fact and completely irrelevant for a game being played in 2009.

7. Wilner says: The Cardinal believe they can win and almost did a year ago with a gimpy Toby Gerhart and no Andrew Luck.
OTP says: Oh my God! And the Ducks don’t have LeGarrette Blount like they did last year! Okay, give Wilner credit. He’s getting closer to having something to do with 2009. Still pretty irrelevant, though, considering the conditions of that game were terrible.

FOTB Pick

6. Wilner says: Masoli played a clunker in his last game in the Bay Area against California.
OTP says: Yikes! That’s three completely irrelevant points in a row. The Cal game was played in roughly three feet of standing water. Masoli has never played well in rainy conditions. Saturday’s forecast is all sunshine.

5. Wilner says: Only USC has gone undefeated in Pac-10 play this decade so Oregon is due to lose eventually.
OTP says: Perhaps the most irrelevant point of all. Oregon is playing Stanford, not some mystic voodoo that disallows a team from winning all its games.

4. Wilner says: The game is played on grass which will slow Oregon’s speed, but not effect Stanford’s physicality.
OTP says: Maybe. The Ducks have only played one game on grass this year and it was their worst offensive output of the season. It was also without Jeremiah Masoli and LaMichael James was still well over 100 yards. Pretty sure the playing surface won’t mean a thing when Oregon’s at full strength.

3. Wilner says: Stanford’s wine and cheese crowd will have a reverse atmosphere effect and lull the Ducks to sleep.
OTP says: Really? This is the third best reason Stanford wins? There will be plenty of atmosphere courtesy of the thousands of Duck fans expected to attend.

2. Wilner says: It’s good to play teams after they faced USC. Oregon is primed for a letdown. Stanford is rested coming off of a bye.
OTP says: Uh oh, Stanford is outscoring opponents 109-21 under Jim Harbaugh coming off of a bye week.  What? That was against Washington State, San Jose State and Notre Dame? Really, they even lost to 3-9 Notre Dame? Scary. Well, what about teams letting down after playing USC? A quick fact check reveals Oregon is 6-1 this decade following games against the Trojans.

1. Wilner says: Stanford controls the ball with it’s power running game against an undersized Oregon defense. They mix in some play-action passes and the net result is less possession time for Oregon. Stanford will score at will in the second half while the Ducks offense sputters from its lack of rhythm.
OTP says: Ok, if Stanford does win, this is probably how it happens. However, the blog would like to dip into an overused cliche and channel Lee Corso with it’s first “Not so fast my friend!” of the season. Oregon is two seconds from being in last place for time of possession. You can go on long drives all you want. It takes IBM’s Roadrunner supercomputer more time to run 2+2 than it does for the Ducks to score (too geeky? Yeah, thought so). As for wearing Oregon down in the second half, well Mr. Wilner, it hasn’t happened yet, so it’s bound to happen now. Right?

Week 2 is in the books. Once again, I dug deep and chased down some sources for the added perspective.

1. USC (2-0)
Why: I promised they’d be on top with a win at Ohio State. No team has proven more than they have and for the rest of the season, they stay here until someone beats them. I’m not as sold on Matt Barkley as an easily impressed media, though. That final drive was Joe McKnight. Give credit to Barkley for not losing the game, but I don’t think USC’s offense is necessarily championship caliber until he gets more experience.
Every college football fan in this country: @&%#, I thought this was a down year!!

2. UCLA (2-0)
Why: My rankings are result-based from the season at hand. Cal has looked great, but they haven’t proven anything other than that they can beat bad teams. UCLA won on the road at Tennessee and I would think of all fans, Cal can see why that’s impressive.
Quarterback Kevin Craft: “Coach, can I go back in now? Kevin (Prince) is hurt. I swear I’ll only throw two picks if you let me play. Please? Coach Neuheisel: Yeeeeaaaah, no. No, definitely not.

3. Cal (2-0)
Why: The Maryland win has less of a shine after the Terrapins nearly lost to James Madison. Beating Eastern Washington means nothing. Basically, they haven’t proven anything yet, but that’s not their fault. In my eyes, they are a legitimate challenger to USC.
Offensive Coordinator Andy Ludwig: “We’re averaging 55.5 points a game. I think I’ve proven I’m good at my job.” Us: “Oregon scored 50 points one time in your three years. What you did to our offense was a crime. You should be behind bars.”

4. Oregon State (2-0)
Why: The Beavers need to send giant gift baskets to all interested parties in that 3rd and 26 play on their game-winning drive. Without the pass interference penalty, they are probably answering questions about why they can’t win non-conference road games (I guess that wasn’t really a reason why they are 4th. Oh well.).
UNLV DB Deante Purvis: “You’re welcome. Please send the check in care of my bookie.”

5. Arizona (2-0)
Why: Well, looks like that win against Central Michigan was fairly impressive now that we’ve seen the Chippewas beat Michigan State.
AP Poll Voters: “We’re paying attention. Win at Iowa and we’ll consider it. It’s just that we haven’t seen you in, like, 11 years, so you’ll just have to be patient.”

6. Oregon (1-1)
Why: That was a tough ten days. There’s still a lot to figure out with this team, but after the opener, any win is a good win.
Oregon Fans: “Uh, well, hmmm, I, uh, yeah.”

7. Stanford (1-1)
Why: Oh Stanford, what happened? You’re my sleeper team this year. I believe in you, but come on. You let one get away and you know it. And don’t give me the 9 am PST start time.  You lost that thing in the second half.
Coach Jim Harbaugh: “Would somebody please show me this clipping penalty? I haven’t been able to find it.”

8. Arizona State (1-0)
Why: They’ve played one game and beat an FCS opponent. They travel to Georgia in two weeks and unless someone above them does something awful, they’ll stay in the bottom three until then.
Louisiana-Monroe: “We’re someone. Didn’t you see our 58-0 win over Texas Southern?” Me: “No, did anyone?”

9. Washington
Why: Because they won! They won! Oh, yes, they won!
Washington Fans: “We’re back, baby! Woof!” The rest of us: “Calm down Rufus. You beat Idaho.”

10. Washington State
Why: Sorry Cougs. The Huskies finally won a game and you are bad. Really bad. Paul Wulff…not a good choice.
Washington State fans: “We know, Nick. It’s kind of obvious so could you just stop rubbing it in?”

I meant to do this last week, but I must have got knocked cold by a LeGarrette Blount right cross because my memory on Friday went bad and I forgot. Better late than never. I’m expecting 100% accuracy this season.

Stanford @ Wake Forest
I admit, I have a thing for Jim Harbaugh. He speaks his mind. He’s not one of those coaches that just sits there and spews talking points. So when he said the following in a post by Ted Miller, I smiled.

“If you’re playing a team from the opposite coast, let’s see if we can screw them on the time of kickoff,” he said. “If it’s a West Coast team playing on the East Coast, you play as early as possible and if it’s an East Coast team playing on the West Coast, you play as late as possible.”

He’s right, of course, and the smart pick is Wake Forest so that’s what I’m going with despite a strong inclination that the Cardinal might pull this one off.

The Pick: Wake Forest

Idaho @ Washington
You might ask why I’m smiling so much. My response would be (1) it’s kind of creepy that you know I’m smiling and (2) there is at least a possibility that Washington loses this game and sets a Pac-10 record for most consecutive losses. Is it going to happen? No, but it could and you have to have been pretty damn terrible to surpass a record that Oregon State set twice during 28 years of ineptitude.

The Pick: Washington (Congratulations! You’re all winners!)

UCLA @ Tennessee
Unfortunately for the Pac-10 this year, most of its key non-conference games are being played on the road. It could be a good conference with a bad draw. That’s how it goes. Slick Rick is still working on officially ending the dynasty in L.A. and hasn’t had time to figure out how to pull a win out at Rocky Top. This one could be ugly.

The Pick: Tennessee

E. Washington @ California
Now here’s a game you would find in the SEC. Top ten team meets Div. I FCS school. It’s one of those picks where I should have a handicap. I should have to guess the number of times Andy Ludwig calls for a screen pass on third and long to get any points for this pick. Actually, we already know the answer to that (hint: every damn time).

The Pick: California

Hawaii @ Washington State
Great, the Cougs buy out of next season’s game against Hawaii the very week they have to play the (Rainbow) Warriors. Why do you do anything that could remotely effect the attitude of the team you are playing, especially when it’s one of two games on the entire schedule you have any chance of winning? Bah, the Cougs can still handle this and get the Pac-10 above .500 against the WAC.

The Pick: Washington State

USC @ Ohio State
Last year, this was a no-brainer. This season, it still is but with just a hint of intrigue. After all, it’s in Columbus and features Terrelle (I really want to visit Oregon…no, seriously, I’m going to visit…just wait a little longer…I need to make this recruiting thing last a few more months…Surprise, I’m going to Ohio State) Pryor who should make it difficult for USC’s defense. Still, come on, it’s Ohio State in a game against a good team. Easy pick.

The Pick: USC

N. Arizona @ Arizona
They seem to play this game every year. Or maybe they alternate it with ASU. I don’t know. I don’t really care and I’m kind of annoyed I have to spend any time debating who will win this game. So I won’t.

The Pick: Arizona

Purdue @ Oregon
Either Oregon is in complete disarray and is about to slide into the worst season in program history or it’s completely fine. We’ll know more Saturday. The bet here, and it’s because I’m a total homer, is that Oregon will prove in a big way that they have a lot left to say about this season.

The Pick: Oregon

Oregon State @ UNLV
Fortunately, if things do go sour quickly for Oregon, we can always flip it over to this game instead and watch the Beavers execute their annual big early loss on the road (someone be sure to tell my Beaver family I’m kidding. I need money for my wedding next year).

The Pick: Oregon State

Welcome Pac-10 newcomers Steve Sarkisian and Chip Kelly. You are the new representatives at this award ceremony for 2009. We hope you are honored to have such a prestigious award in your name.

The Dennis Erickson Award for “What, I’m Still in the Same Place? Why?”
…And the Winner Is: Taylor Mays, USC Safety. It’s shocking that he came back. Everyone assumed he would enter the NFL draft as a surefire first round pick. Instead, he’s at USC for his senior year and figures to anchor a raw, but talented USC defense.

The Chip Kelly Award for “I’m Destined For Greatness, So Why is Everyone a Little Unsure?”
…And the winner is: Whichever quarterback starts for USC in its opening game. Two Trojan quarterbacks have won Heisman Trophies under Pete Carroll and every time they break in someone new, the doubters quickly subside. Still, until Aaron Corp or Matt Barkley prove it, it’s all guesswork.

The Pete Carroll Award for “How Many Times Do I Have to Say It? This is Where I Want To Be”
…And the winner is: Markus Wheaton, OSU WR. Yep, Wheaton is a Beaver. Duck fans probably still can’t believe the cousin of Kenny Wheaton would do such a thing. We’re still waiting to hear it was a joke. The Ducks now just have to hope Oregon State doesn’t get a program-defining moment from Kenny’s cousin.

The Steve Sarkisian Award for “We’re Going to Be Awesome Because I Said So”
…And the winner is: The Arizona Wildcats. Anyone else feel like Mike Stoops’ bunch has been the next coming of greatness in the conference for the last five years? All they have is a 6-6 regular season and a Las Vegas Bowl trophy to show for it. Sure, the honor could have been given to Washington, but it was ineligible to win its coach’s own award.

The Paul Wulff Award for “Hi, We’re Still Up Here. Hey, over here! Watch for us, We’re Going to Be Better. Ah, Screw It, We’re Terrible.”
…And the Winner Is: Kevin Prince, UCLA QB. Okay, that’s not fair to the redshirt freshman Prince and “terrible” is too strong of a word, but the point is that even though UCLA is moving on from a disastrous year at the quarterback position, they undoubtedly have more growing pains ahead.

The Mike Stoops Award for “I’m a Star. No, Really, Ignore the Mediocrity Because I’m a Star!”
…And the Winner Is: Jake Locker. Sorry, Saint Locker of the Seattleites. It’s not that I want to give you this award, it’s just that you’ve never done anything to justify all the hype your fans are heaping on you. Feel free to prove us wrong.

The Rick Neuheisel Award for “We’re Coming For You No Matter How Ridiculous That Sounds”
…And the Winner Is: The Stanford Cardinal. Believe it or not, Stanford might be good this year. It’s even possible they creep into the top four teams in the conference. I wouldn’t be surprised to see the Cardinal make a leap to a bowl game for this first time since 2001.

The Mike Riley Award for “What Else Do We Have to Do to Prove We’re Good?”
…And the Winner Is: The whole gosh-darned (tribute to Riley-speak) Pac-10. A 5-0 bowl record in 2008 and stellar records this decade against fellow BCS teams just isn’t enough. Distribution of your product to the masses matters and the Pac-10 is lacking a national audience. Just keep on winning, I guess.

The Jeff Tedford Award for “How Did We Go From Underdog to Overrated?”
…And the Winner Is: Jeremiah Masoli. As a fan of the Duck’s quarterback, it hurts to put him here, but it’s a natural fit. Masoli still has a lot to prove as his hype is riding on the back of a three game stretch to end 2008. He’ll need to put together a full season of strong play.

The Jim Harbaugh Award for “We’re Borderline Geniuses and Oh, Yeah, We Can Play Too”
…And the Winner Is: Mike Nixon, ASU LB. Let’s see, Nixon carries a 4.05 GPA in Political Science and was an Honorable Mention All-Conference player in 2008. And this year, he’s tabbed as a preseason first team player by many. Yeah, he kind of owns this category.

View past Coach’s Awards: 2008

Because pre-season awards are every bit as important as pre-season rankings, it’s time to unveil my 1st Annual Pre-Season Coaches Awards, each named in honor of a Pac-10 coach.

The Dennis Erickson Award for “It’s Been Fun, But it’s Time to Move On”
…And the Winner Is: Taylor Mays, USC Safety. An overwhelming consensus first-round pick by every useless mock draft the internet has to offer, the junior is a season away from becoming an early entrant to the 2009 NFL Draft.

The Mike Bellotti Award for “If the Game Was Only 61 Minutes Long, I Would Have Won”
…And the winner is: Kevin Riley, Cal Quarterback. Some advice for you this year, Kevin: spike the ball, call a timeout, or run out of bounds.

The Pete Carroll Award for “I Don’t Care If You’re Good, I Just Don’t Like You”
…And the winner is: Rudy Carpenter, Arizona State Quarterback. I don’t feel like I should have to explain this. Actually, I’m not even sure if I can. I just don’t like him.

The Tyrone Willingham Award for “I Looked A Lot Better When I First Got Onto Campus”
…And the winner is: Ben Olson, UCLA Quarterback. He’s injured. Again. As a former “5-Star Recruit,” big things were expected and yet, it never happened.

The Paul Wulff Award for “Player You’ve Never Heard of and Probably Never Will”
…And the Winner Is: Jeff Bowen, Washington State Offensive Lineman. The criteria here was to find a guy on the consensus 10th place team that is a senior and listed 4th on the depth chart at his position. Hopefully, Jeff Bowen Googles his name someday and finds out about this prestigious award. Also, given that he is 100 lbs heavier than me at the same height, I would appreciate it if he has a sense of humor.

The Mike Stoops Award for “Biggest Douchebag”
…And the Winner Is: Mike Stoops, Arizona Head Coach. Congratulations, you just won your own award. I’d say the voting is rigged, but I think we can all agree, you earned it coach.

The Rick Neuheisel Award for “Player Most Likely to Get Penalized”
…And the Winner Is: Jeremy Perry, Oregon State Guard. He wins for two reasons: (1) He’s an offensive lineman and those guys hold on every play and (2) He’s quoted on ESPN.com saying, “I’m nasty, even if the whistle blows, I guarantee I’ll get the last shove.”

The Mike Riley Award for “The First Month Doesn’t Really Matter Anyway”
…And the Winner Is: Tie between Jake Locker (UW Quarterback) and Mark Sanchez (USC Quarterback). Both players have suffered injuries that could cause early season issues for their respective teams if they don’t come back healthy.

The Jeff Tedford Award for “Yeah, He Was Great When I Coached Him, But What About Now?”
…And the Winner Is: No, not Joey Harrington, Trent Dilfer, Kyle Boller, Akili Smith, AJ Feeley or Aaron Rodgers. The winner is Mitch Mustain, USC Quarterback. The hype is there for the heralded transfer from Arkansas. Will he deliver, especially if Mark Sanchez can’t go?

The Jim Harbaugh Award for “I Probably Shouldn’t Have Said That, But I’ll Go Ahead and Back It Up Anyway”
…And the Winner Is: Carson Palmer, former USC and current Cincinnati Bengals Quarterback. All’s quiet among current players so far in 2008 so we turn to Palmer’s ill-advised diatribe against Ohio State. Sure, he’s right and his alma mater will back him up, but that doesn’t endear you to your current Ohio fan base.